I am really lucky to work with a lovely bunch of people, a few weeks after Emily's dad left I went to the office for a catch up and told everyone and they were the perfect combination of angry and sympathetic. One friend absolutely refused to believe it for a while and genuinely thought I … Continue reading 20th June: Green Eyed Monster on Steroids 😱
Bit of a lazy post, 90% copied from a book. I'm reading I'm absolutely fine: A Manual for imperfect women pretty much because Claudia Winkleman said it was brilliant and I like her. I'm not even through the free sample yet but I'm feeling generally a bit mental at the moment and it's always fun … Continue reading Pure, spiky vulnerability. Or…are you basically three today?
This is totally going to screw up the chronology of the diary entries but hey ho. I've gotten behind on the blog and I've been avoiding social media. The social media bit meant I got two weeks in without realising Handmaid's Tale has come back on TV. Shocking. Thank goodness for the Guardian alerting me … Continue reading 19th June: Self pity party
Well the title says it all really. I had a hard time. A really hard time and cried a lot, which I know is a common occurance but CRAZY crying this time. But I did collect this sun cream clickety click click here from Amazon. I'd heard good things about the Body Shop spf 50 … Continue reading 9th June: Just a shitty day. Shitty McShit Shit
I was feeling shitty last night and messaging a friend having a right old whinge. She suggested Emily and I come to York early and have tea and chat at hers before we wander into the city to meet one of our other single mum friends to follow the Pride march onto the racecourse. We … Continue reading 8th June: York Pride
My therapist actually said it can be a good idea to draw up a wishlist of what you want in a man before you start dating. I think the idea is that once you start dating you can get swept up in the fun / romance / lust and waste your time and emotions on … Continue reading My Perfect Man
It was just me and Emily today, which happens a lot and I'm normally fine with but today I just feel really lonely. I'm also really stressed about how I'll cope when I go back to work. Mostly the thought of getting a strong willed baby out the door before 8am...a strong willed baby that … Continue reading 7th June: Feeling lonely
If you read my last two posts you will be aware this was a joke. This is not different, I cry a lot. I went to a barbecue at my ex's parents house as I want Emily to get used to his mother as she will be looking after her a couple of days when … Continue reading 2nd June: Thought I would try something different and just cry and cry
Fucking hell it hurts. You may have seen this coming, or you might not. Either way I bet it hit you like a ton of bricks. The realisation that the person you thought would be with you for the rest of your life is going. That you aren't the most important person to them anymore, … Continue reading To the woman whose husband just left
This is a really boring one, feel free to ignore. I just feel like I need to do an entry for every day as I told myself I would...which is stupid. But anyhoo: It was my last counselling session, after ten sessions I feel like I should have some profound learnings to report back on … Continue reading 22nd May: Counselling and Pizza
NB : The photo has nothing to do with the article. I searched 'Mental Health' in the WordPress gallery and this inexplicably came up and I liked it. One of my close friends is like a self help / psychology / counselling book expert now. She mentioned the theory of attachment styles to me and … Continue reading What kind of ‘Attached’ are you?
So I technically can get things done when I'm looking after Emily. She is slowly gaining the ability to sit and amuse herself. But she does like a lot of attention and has a very strong interest in the cat food. I've worked out that if I put Emily at the far end of the … Continue reading 7th May: A tiny traitor
So today was a nice day, we went to visit Emily's dad. Had a walk with the dog in the woods and lunch at Bettys. I enjoyed the day spent together but now I feel a lot of sadness about what we could be missing out on. I'm too tired to write more, and it … Continue reading 5th May: Feeling blue
Note that I put 'a little', if you read a few posts you'll find I'm not overly qualified for feeling 'a lot' better...but here are my two cents anyway: Put your phone down ...not this second. Read my blog first please. Then put the phone down. For lots of reasons you should put your phone … Continue reading How to feel a little bit better when you’re feeling really shit
Another day in York so obviously I made sure to have my phone with me. I've been feeling a bit down this week and was due to meet a friend, when she messaged me mirroring a few things I was thinking I thought sod it...let's use my afternoon tea vouchers and have a treat. Carpe … Continue reading 3rd May: Bloody LOADS of photos
So I am a bit late with this weekend's diary entries. I've been having a hard time lately (not even ex husband related) and just couldn't be bothered, I won't elaborate as I don't owe WordPress every detail of my life. Sometimes you just want to binge watch TV and not use your brain (my … Continue reading 27th & 28th April
So I got rather sweary on my last post. Maybe a bit too many uses of the word fuck. Every now and then I get pretty angry at the situation. It's ironic how the post a couple of days before was showing off about Rita giving me a metaphorical gold star in counselling. Anyway I'm … Continue reading 26th April: Must apologise for all that flagrant language. Oopso
All the ways I am angry right now. Photo completely unrelated but cute. Click on it for ranty husband hating rage.
A short post about my love of inspirational quotes, including a much better one than this title. Click it to read it 🖱️
Some days I own the title single mother with pride. Single mothers do everything and that makes them extremely capable and strong, who can't be proud of that! (...gets a bit more depressing from here I'm afraid. Click on the title for more.)
She also keeps telling me that I am grieving, I think it is really helpful to talk about divorce in terms of grief and loss rather than heartache.